Friday, March 19, 2010

how would you respond?

I get an email from DailyWorth a few times a week - it's a website about financial knowledge and strategies directed towards women. Sometimes the emails are strictly informative - how does a 401k work? - and sometimes they address specific situations women (especially working women) deal with. Most of it is pretty interesting and informative, and valuable for any adult.

This week, the topic was Ending the Superwoman Syndrome. And I know this is complicated - my roommates and I have discussed this at length, wondering where the idea came from, how much we've actually believed it and what choices we're going to make to not succumb to the myth that we can have it all.

So I was interested in what this woman had to say. Clearly, she did not find it fulfilling to be Superwoman, but how did she fix it? What were her thoughts on making choices? What ones did she make and why?

I read her article, and here's what I gleaned, based on the details of her life that she provided: she made her choices, and now she is a single parent with a successful business. She also has less stress and makes great money.

In the comments, I asked her what she was looking for, ultimately. Was it money? Less stress? I said it sounded like her business was more successful than her marriage, and wondered if maybe the focus has swung from one extreme - focusing solely on everyone else - to the other, focusing on only ourselves.

I got a couple of rebuttals in the comments - and I'll admit, I don't know the author's situation. But if she did choose her business, great money, less stress over working on her marriage or sacrificing for her son, I'm worried. And I want to know if we truly understand what we're choosing to have, and what we're choosing to give up.