lenting

i'm writing on a deliciously portland evening - finally, it's rainy and gray and it feels very northwest. my roommates are out of the house - and i'm resisting the urge to turn on anything with noise. so it's me, the ticking clocks and the rain.

i say delicious because i have been consumed with food lately. or maybe i've been consuming a lot of food? either way, all of my reading lately has inspired a compost bin, a csa (community supported agriculture) membership with my roommate, and some tasty treats like tomato jam with goat cheese, lynnie's roasted red pepper dip and valentine's day eggs in a nest :)

i have a few books in the hopper - exposed, about chemicals, our health and politics (scary!), the omnivore's dilemma (the prequel to "in defense of food" which was fantastic) and orthodoxy by g.k. chesterton. the last is one that i've been struggling to read (confession: i read it when i need to fall asleep). but i have faith that it will eventually get rolling and i will be as impressed as everyone else.

what else? i just watched "king corn" this weekend, an interesting documentary about how much corn we grow and eat and process here in the states. i am grimacing right now, partly because of how ubiquitous corn is and we don't even know it, and partly because i had greasy, butter popcorn this afternoon and loved it. anyway, it's a good film - rent it.

so, tomorrow is ash wednesday... and i'm debating whether or not to give up anything. two years ago i gave up coffee, then ended up visiting seattle for the first time (coffee capital!) in the middle of lent. i was there with a pastor, so i asked his professional opinion on whether or not i could break the fast. i mean, come on - i was in seattle. he kind of rolled his eyes, sighed, and asked me why i was fasting in the first place. and i really had no other answer than that i was doing what you're supposed to do at lent. two hours later, i was drinking coffee, strolling down the street towards pike place market - and then spilled all over my shirt. it was like getting the stink-eye from god. moral of the story? don't give up something unless you really mean it...

happy lent!

it's spring and it's february

This is my second non-Michigan winter, and I have to say, it is fantastic. I can't boast temps in the 70s like my friends in California, but there is no snow, no biting cold winds and I don't have to wear boots every day to work. I hear the rainy season may be starting up soon, so I'm mentally preparing for that, but otherwise, this is great.

I'm reading a fascinating book right now called Whatever it Takes by Paul Tough. I first heard this story on This American Life (listen to this show, please) and immediately put a hold on this book - back in October. I finally got it last week and have been devouring it for the last few days. Oddly enough, the author interviews a teacher whose name I recognize from Grand Rapids - it is a small, small world.

Anyway, the book has been inspiring to say the least, and is one of the many things over the last several months (years, maybe?) that is making me think about what I'm going to do with my life. And I want to send a little shout-out here to all the people who don't have their career path figured out - I am one of you. I am forever changing my mind, searching for the thing that I'm passionate about, the thing that makes me angry so I'll want to do something to make it better, however you want to put it. It's out there, somewhere. Some of us just take the scenic route.

dtv - better tv? or overtaking our lives??

so, if you haven't already heard, television goes digital in february. and honestly, if you haven't already heard, you've been living under a rock. my question is this: does anyone find it strange that we're able to spend a serious amount of time, money and energy telling each other about television?? there are commercials specifically for older adults, countdowns to the switch and even countdowns to the tests to make sure we're ready for the switch!

please tell me there are more important things in life.

books books books

I love to read. And I love books. My first job was as a library aide at Oshtemo Public Library - I helped people check out books, look for books and mostly shelved books. At my last job, I worked with a publisher and got to see how books went from manuscripts to hardcover to softcover. *sigh* I love books. So I have some recommendations:

The Road of Lost Innocence: I picked up this book at my friend's house this weekend and read it one day. It's the story of a girl who was sold into the sex trade in Cambodia and how she has become the head of an organization that fights for the rights of the girls that are abused. It's tragic and moving, and makes me wonder where such violent hatred toward women in that part of the world comes from.

Bel Canto: I kept seeing the name of this book, and knew that it took place in South America - so I wanted to read it. It's beautiful - the story of a dinner party held hostage and what happens with the captives from around the world, including a world-renowned opera singer, and their captors. I recommend listening to Chopin while you read this.

Currently reading: Quo Vadis, The Time Traveler's Wife, and waiting on Whatever it Takes from the library. Send me your recommendations!

freakonomics

Is this economic crisis starting to freak anyone else out just a little?

I've been avoiding my Simple IRA account balance for the last month or so - you know, trying not face my reality. And now, considering rolling it into a Roth and trying another company. Complicated and something I'd rather not think about at the moment. But that is what I end up discussing during my lunch hour with a coworker.

I read that the Dow may sit at around 6,000 points for a while, and we should get ready for it. I'm waiting to feel the effects of all of this - it's not like I'm spending my money all over the place, but really, if this is going to be anywhere close to the Great Depression, life as we know it will change. Predictions for my own life:

- Sit-ups and push-ups in my bedroom (maybe some jackknives)
- Rice and eggs
- Walking, not driving, to the pub on Mississippi
- Moving back to South America to live cheaply (kidding, Mom!)

Is an economic slowdown something that will affect absolutely everyone? For me, I'm hoping to maintain a job throughout the shakedowns, to continue to receive a salary. Maybe I'm part of the core group that keeps this whole machine going while everything gets straightened out. Does that mean that I'm expected to continue spending at the same rate as before?

Side notes:

I found a woman in Chicago who I admire, mucho - her name is Esther J. Cepeda, and she is a marketing director, but also a Spanish-speaker, teacher and writer. Her work is focused on bringing loans to students in Illinois, as well as giving us an interesting perspective on current events. Check out www.600words.com.

I listen to Pandora at work - day in, day out. Lately, I go back and forth between Ulrich Schnauss (German, techno pop) and Chopin. Both are incredible. Schnauss's music sounds like good old 80s movies to me, and for whatever reason, it's incredibly comforting. And it gives me that feeling I had, way back in the day - that my life was new, fresh, and everything great was still ahead of me. And Chopin, well, it's Chopin. Enough said.

Fall

It's been officially four months since I moved to Portland. So much has happened! I'm sitting at my desk in my room, listening to music, looking at pictures of family and friends, and as always, wondering what's next.

I spent the first 5-6 weeks getting to know the city, and meeting friends - and hosting visitors - and wondering when I would get another paycheck. Fortunately, my first meeting with a temp agency brought in a job with an architectural firm as their receptionist. Little did I know it would turn into a full-time job as their marketing director.

I also moved into a house with three other girls in a fun neighborhood on the north side of Portland. Last weekend, I picked up a car - it would seem like I have most of the basics covered.

A few things I'm figuring out along the way: it doesn't matter where you are, it's who you're with. I miss my family - especially my niece and nephew (and soon-to-be-here nephew!) and wish I were closer to them. And there are so many people back in Grand Rapids who I think about often.

But I also miss Chile, a lot. I read the journal I kept while I was there, I talk to my friends who I volunteered with - some who are still there - and I look through the pictures of my kids. I may start saving money in a Return to Chile for a While fund. We'll see how that goes...

I took my first boxing classes this week since I've been here - they were fantastic. I don't know what it is about that sport (if that's what you want to call it) but I love the feeling of hitting something hard, of feeling the impact I'm having. Maybe that's a sign.

I went to a grad school fair this morning - I don't know what I was hoping to find, and it's not that I'm thinking about leaving my job anytime soon, but I keep feeling like I can do something different. I struggle with wondering if there's something more I want to do and knowing that no matter where I am or what I'm doing, there are always opportunities to serve, to make a difference, no matter how small or insignificant it seems. Not every experience has to be thousands of miles away.

Today it rained on and off, with patches of sun in between. It's feeling like fall.

this life

i'm watching michael bloomberg on meet this press talking about the bail-out of freddie mac and fannie mae. and i actually understand what he's talking about with this whole mortgage mess. the reason is this:

www.thislife.com

go to the radio archives and stream the show in may 2008 called "the giant pool of money". it's excellent.